You can be average and settle.... or you can be obsessed and have it all!
Intro
Welcome to 3 Things You Can Use, where Maddi and I decode self-improvement and entrepreneurship through books, three things at a time.
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This week's book is Be Obsessed or Be Average, by Grant Cardone.
and they say obsession with success is bad...
But his obsession has led to him owning 5 privately held companies that do sales of almost $100M a year, he was named one of the top 10 most influential CEOs in the world this past year, he is a New York Times Bestselling author of seven books now, an internationally acclaimed speaker, speaking all over the world, an attentive husband, a doting father of two girls, a contributing member of society, last year he raised over $100M for charities.
He says, "I'm not bragging. I just want to make it perfectly clear that what I've achieved in my life is not because I'm of some particular invention, I didn't go public on wall street, I didn't create some great app, I didn't have some spectacular breakthrough, monster invention, okay? It hasn't been because of luck. It hasn't been because I was connected to the country club or the right people. It wasn't because somebody gave me a bunch of money or seeded my start. My success has come from my commitment, my willingness to embrace my obsessions. To go all in, all the time...
I am where I am today only because I have embraced my obsession with success...
I made it... and I want you to make it. "
So, what are three things we can use from this book?
3 Things You Can Use
1. His Story
Starting from hIgh school. He was tremendously disruptive. High energy. Got kicked out of class and beat up by the football team.
By the time he graduated, he fell into the wrong crowd, drinking, smoking, doing drugs.
When was 19, he was using everything and anything available, drug wise...
He finished college for the sake of his father's last wishes. He was 20Ibs underweight with a grey complexion, thanks to the drugs.
But the one thing he did have was a job at a car dealership...
That he hated.
He had no self-esteem, no direction and no belief in himself.
He was obsessed with the wrong things.
and due to this misplaced obsession and his hanging with the wrong people, one day he was beaten up within an inch of his life.
He spent 3 days in the hospital, got 75 stitches in his head and face and has scars that are still visible today.
He hated everything and was a disappointment to everyone.
He went to rehab. When the insurance money ran out, he left rehab.
He made a personal commitment that day to never return to drugs, and to tap into his addictive personality but use it for his benefit.
He was done with the past and ready for the future.
He wrote down his goals. Obsessed with his future.
Author, master sales person, husband, father, Rich!
Instead of being obsessed with horrible habits, he allowed himself to become obsessed with success, like he was when he was a child.
6 months later, he was still clean and he was the top sales person at the car dealership.
He was still using his energy the right way.
Finally, knew he was headed in the right direction and he began to dream again.
Success became his new drug. His obsessive nature was working for him not against him... and it still is...
If you've been labeled with an addictive personality, an obsessive personality, you might think it's a bad thing... but Grant posits that you've got a gift.
You just have to tap into the power of your obsession...
2. Future Focus
Maintaining a focus on the future is an essential factor to getting what you want out of life.
With no consideration for the future, there would be no point to having goals, because you wouldn't care about anything but right now.
And it's easy to say, "of course I have a focus on the future
."
But that particular focus on the future only pokes it's head up and shakes you awake at those times when you're messing up. The focus on the future that brushes the cheeto dust off of you lap, turns off the TV and makes you say, "oh my gosh, I've got to go do something with my life."
This is a short-lived focus on the future that only makes an appearance out of necessity. That only helps you to climb out of the holes just as you've gotten to the bottom of them.
But if you want that focus on the future to be your best friend, at your side at all times and helping you to stay motivated to get your goals accomplished, you've got to have it be a serious part of your life.
People who complain and/or go to group meetings to talk about their problems, constantly tell their brains to look out for and focus on problems.
Not intentionally, but practice makes perfect. The more they practice bringing their problems to light, to complain, to tell the group, to feel sorry for themselves, the more their brain makes it a part of their mission to find and focus on problems. Leading to a relatively miserable day to day.
Though, this works visa versa. If you constantly have a focus on your future, your brain just changes up the wiring to better suit this way of thinking.
Instead of reminding yourself of your problems, constantly remind yourself of your goals. Write down your goals atleast once a day. They will change too... No problem, keep writing them down. At night before bed, in the morning, during breaks, on walks, at the gym... Wherever and whenever.
A focus on your goals is the healthiest way to focus on your future. Write down your goals and bring focus on the future to your work, to your home, to all of your bowling outings.
Constantly prime your future focus so you can start your action engine, whenever you need it.
3. Obsess
You don't have a life until you're obsessed.
Being obsessed will not keep you from doing other things, obsession isn't about settling or sacrificing things that are important to you...
Obsession is about having it all... Health, family, career, money.
Obsessed people demand it all and that's why they do it all.
Grant says,
"Average is a failing formula, it works for no one."
"There are enough people on this planet that will hoodwink you, trick you, lie to you, betray you. Don't you stand in line and be one of them. At least honor your goals and dreams and purpose."
Obsess with persistence. A rock and a stream, the stream wins.
Grant says,
"Having a great life is not going to be easy, having an average life is going to be a disaster. Having a great life takes effort, having an average life is miserable."
"Look, persistence is the characteristic of legends, it's the characteristic of the greats, it's the characteristic of the genius"
"You need to be willing to (persistently) go all out, crazy, insane in every area of your life."
"Victory comes at a price... but so does settling."
"Do whatever you've got to do to refuel your obsession. If you need to buy something to keep you going, do it. Always raise and refuel your obsessions, stay young and vibrant and excited."
"Being obsessed is the only way to create enough success to get from where you are to where you should be. Being obsessed is the only way to create enough success today to be an inspiration to others, much less yourself, and actually make a difference on this planet. Being obsessed is mandatory in order for you to have enough significant bandwidth to provide guidance and support for all the other people who need you to step up."
He says,
"Let's get obsessed. Let's get crazy. Let's go for broke. Look obsession isn't just a mental game. It's the total game. This is the end all. This is the all in, stay in, obsessed, everything's rocking and working. Because the evil forces of average, entitlement, normalcy and complacency are working against you like gravity everyday."
Get obsessed. Obsess forever.
Recap:
Got diagnosed with an obsessive/addictive personality? Good
Write down your goals everyday and keep your future top of mind
Be crazy insane obsessed and have it all
This is book is awesome. It's a great balance of about 70% motivation and 30% strategies and tactics.
And he gets you excited. He reads the book himself if you get the audiobook and he's got great energy. If you're going to get this book, get the audiobook.
It gets you pumped about whatever you're working on -- or wanting to work on.
And he's also got some great stuff on sales and managing employees, running your business.
Though there were a few contradictions it seemed, and he gets away with saying some of the things he says because of his energy, hearing anyone else say some of these things might have you asking a few more questions...
But overall I recommend this book if you're looking for your lost energy or you want a boost.
If you're not subscribed to Average Optimized, make sure to subscribe so you don't miss next week's video, thanks for watching with us and--
we'll see you next week!
Bye!
Want to Read it?
Audible Free Trial (get this book for free!)
Be Obsessed or Be Average (Audiobook)
Be Obsessed or Be Average (Physical Copy)
(These links give me a little bump if you decide to use them. Thank you!)
Attribution:
Punching Sounds by: Mike Koenig
Elevator Music https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBlFHuCzPgY