How to actually finally stick to your goal (and not give up)
Arrange your world to support your goal
How to avoid trading in your likeability for your success
Right after this awesome intro:
Brendon Burchard, an extremely popular personal development coach and the author of this book, built a list of six things that defined high performance. Then, out of thousands of people who tested themselves on these dimensions through his website, he took those who scored highest and interviewed them on their habits.
Then he slapped together the habits, refined them and explained them.
And voila! This book.
So what are 3 Things We Can Use from this book?
3 Things You Can Use
Oooooh a mountain!
I think I’ll climb that.
*One week later*
Ooooooh look, that other mountain is prettier.
Let’s get off this mountain and go climb that one!
*One week later*
Ooooooh but what about THAT mountain!
You guessed it. This perpetual mountain climber will never get to the top of a mountain.
If you’re going to pursue goals, being this type of climber is not going to work.
If you want to reach the top of a mountain, that mountain has to mean something to you.
One of the most important things Brendon, the author, recommends is having clarity. Because without clarity, there is no goal and no reason.
To get clarity, you figure yourself out.
Spend some time figuring out: Who you are. What you find meaningful and fulfilling. What you want. How to get it.
Something that fits your story that you can find enough satisfaction in that you can plan around to improve and participate in.
Then plan and work and develop confidence and climb knowing that you can summit.
Not every mountain is worth the climb – and once you find yours make it so nothing in this world can be said to be certain except for…
2. Death, Taxes and Your Goals
There are four friends you can employ to make your goals impossible to ignore and imperative to accomplish.
The four friends are:
If you choose him as a friend you “tie your identity to doing a good job” and you watch yourself like a hawk.
You take the important elements of your pursuit and you track them.
Chart them then check them off or “X” them out accordingly.
For example; let’s say, you want to train for a marathon and identity man is your friend. You will get your recommended exercise plan from your trainer and you will schedule and plan it out.
You are a runner now.
Every time you miss a workout, that is a hit to your status as a runner. That red “X” across that day hurts. But identity man is good for you. It may hurt when you get that “X,” but you’ll thank him when you cross that finish line.
This guy has a lot to do with your clarity from before. But he ups the game.
By this point you have picked something that fits you well enough and are pursuing it. Carl won’t let you forget about it.
He has relevant online classes scheduled for you that would make you better at the things that impact your goal. He reminds you every morning of what you are doing and why. Your goal is not only part of you now; it is something that you are constantly involved in and thinking about too.
This baby reminds you of the people that need you to succeed. Whoever is the most applicable: Your family, your company, your dog…
He also sets you up to volunteer so you can meet good people who will support what you do and who you can share accountability with.
He’s about making you accountable to your dependents, friends and loved-ones.
She, not only has the easiest requirements but is also the most effective for bringing necessity to your goals.
Urgency lady makes deadlines.
Create deadlines. Put them in your calendar, post them on your computer, write them in the dust on your car – whatever you have to do. Deadlines make things real and they give you a time limit, motivating you to get actual, specific things done.
Keep your relationships with these four friends strong and you will bring a gun to the knife fight.
You have put in the time. You know what you want and you’ve built the slide to get yourself there. But maybe you want some bumpers to keep yourself from ending up in the gutter.
3. The 3 Anti-Practices
There are three anti-practices of high performers:
Think of the people you know that present themselves as better than you. They don’t take you seriously, they brag and brag and they let everyone know how much they love themselves.
Aren’t they great?
You’re working hard and you’re making progress and you suddenly realize:
“I’m better than everybody else”
But, you can’t. Don’t separate yourself from others. Most others have the same potential but are just circumstantially different. And don’t feel too certain of your ideas. He says these are both warning signs. Feeling superior is not worth it...
“Wow that was good” your peers say, referring to the short story you put out.
“No. It could have been better.”
Sure it could have been better. But you put in time and you got something out there. Give yourself some credit. Leave yourself room for improvement of course but don’t associate only bad feelings with your accomplishments. Balance the drive for improvement with pleasure so you can continue striving without burning out.
Feel satisfied here and there.
This is a big one.
Don’t sacrifice the other important areas of your life for your goals.
One area of your life going well while the others are getting milk poured all over them isn’t suitable for SUSTAINED success.
Be careful not to push your children aside all throughout the day while you chop through your goals. Schedule in time for the other things in your life that matter.
So no superiority, dissatisfaction or neglect. Don’t trade your likeability for your success.
Now you’re ready.
You can’t climb a mountain until you pick the right one and get gear that fits you.
Make your goals absolutely necessary by identifying with them, obsessing over them, being accountable to others and setting deadlines.
Avoid superiority, dissatisfaction and neglect if you want to maintain a healthy relationship with your pursuits!
This book was kind of an all you can eat buffet. Brendon has clearly been doing this a long time and, like we saw, has made his mark in the industry. Though they weren’t really habits in the way we usually think of them, he does say the six things are repeated behaviors… so I can’t tell if calling them habits is gimmicky or genuine… But I am an idiot.
Continuing, this book is really well broken down and then pulled apart so that every other sentence is either applicable to the solid stone results and tricks people and the other sentences tickle the cross-legged incensers.
Not bad. I’ll leave links to his website if you want to get deeper into his personal development stuff.
This book was actually a suggestion. Thanks Ehsan!
I got another one too! Thanks Klaus! You guys keep ‘em coming!
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"one week later" bit from Spongebob